I spent nearly 10 hours browsing today :) .. created this new blog , added six to seven postings , updated profile @ sjceonline.com &spent some time with orkutting too :) Now it's 12.30 midnight when all the world is sleeping ( i know majority of the engineering students will be awake now but still the wordings like above will look good :)) I decide to write about my first crush ...

Yup, she was beautiful,attractive most importantly unique in her own way. That's what the thing I like in a girl most. She refused to smile when i said a joke first time & was not curious about me initially.You may feel this was a one sided love or something & this guy is mad to go behind a gal who has not shown interest in him.Critics are welcomed :) But that's the way I am , I like the girls who are reserved , cultured & offcourse cute.Let me stop the descriptions & come back to the topic again.

Her behaviour made me feel like loving her.You may laugh but I decided to toss the coin in front of god to take the decision about her. Told one of my friends to tell her how I feel about her. He told he will do that for me. Thats the most difficult time of my life where I couldn't do anything. I was thinking what will happen next.I was not at all prepared what if she says "yes" in fact. The night was sleepless.I thought my friend might have told her . I couldn't sleep. I was jus staring at the clock waiting for morning 9 o clock to come soon so that my mom leaves to school & i can call and tell my friend not to tell her.

It was nine in the morning. As soon as mom left the house my fingers were dailing my friends number. I got him on the phone. I did not know did he tell her or not. First told him " buddy .. promise me that you never tell it to her" . He told me that he has already told her. I was breathless for a minute. I did not speak. I did not even ask him what was her reply. He told he was lying & he could not meet her the last day. But still I was not out of the shock.After some time I realized nothing has gone wrong & everything will be same as before.

I don't know , what made me not to tell what i felt about her. Eventhough later i realized it wasn't love , was jus an infatuation & those became very common in my life ;) I feel it's really difficult to say "I love you" to someone ... To be frank I am waiting for a gal who is cute,cultured,understading :).. Wish me luck buddies ..


With love ,

krishna